Toxic Relationship

actually i'm lost.
Really not sure if it is worth all this time.

Am i only a spare tyre that you will only come to me when you are bored ?

I guess i needed someone that is able to understand my background and provide the support.

Xuehan is someone that will only help me when he is free.
When i needed morale support, he will always find me a hassle as it disturbed his free / rest time.

He will always see himself that has do everything he can for me.
But none of the times he's there when i needed him the most.
He like to be alone.

The day after my surgery, i told him i'm craving for food.
He went long distance to get it for me.
However, i couldn't swallow much as my appetite is not back yet.
He take it as i took it for granted.
He finds me a hassle at that point of time.

I was home alone on my 3rd day of surgery
I told him i wish he could stay over on my 3rd day to assist me
He say i put him in a spot as he had a wedding to attend that night
It is troublesome for him to travel to & fro
I told him can just provide me some morale support then as i needed it badly.
He says he feel suffocated.
He ignored me the whole day.

I accompanied him when he is bored
I asked him out on days he felt depressed due to WFH
When he need something, i will always assist.

But when i needed a moment of companionship, it is a hassle as long as he is not free.

He is not the one for me.

I should start feeling stupid
Why should i continue on someone like him.
It will hurts however, better than lifelong regrets.

I need to start socialising and meet people
I need to stop wasting my time on Xuehan.

Time to move on :)
This will be the first & last time i am posting about him,
Gonna grow stronger now since the relationship ended.

Always talking about his ex being the toxic one, why not you are the cause of it ?

I don't know if it's a right choice sigh.
It feels like "despite knowing that the fire will hurt, you still go ahead and touch it then complain about it being painful afterwards".

posted from Bloggeroid

1 week 25/10

posted from Bloggeroid

23 October

5th day ~~~